Valentines Day Disasters!
by Akane-Arisu
Summary: This is a short fic I wrote for valentines day! Told from Rukia's POV!


**This is a Valentines fic! Told from Rukia's POV **

**Disclaimer: don't own bleach **

Shit, it's that one time of year that she dreaded the most, and yes, tomorrow was that day. The day of love, the day where two people come together and enjoy a night of passionate lovemaking.

Yes, it was Valentines Day, and yes that meant that she had to do all the chocolate making for all her guy friends. The only reason she didn't only make chocolates for the only guy that she actually cared for, was because that would be way too obvious and she really didn't want him to know about her secret crush on him. Afterall it is a secret.

But the only problem was... She has no idea how to cook and unfortunately, due to the position she was in, there was no way that the noble family that she belonged to would allow her to go to the local supermarket to buy some chocolates. So she had to somehow figure it out herself, and lets just say that cooking wasn't one of her best subjects at school. Since all her life she had, had servants make and prepare her food for her.

But since it was for Valentines Day, she couldn't seem to convince any of the chefs to teach her how to make chocolate. Well...except one, but he was rushed to the hospital after he tasted the chocolate she made. And after that incident, none of the other chefs would agree to teach her how to make chocolates. And she was kinda banned from entering the kitchen, cause of the mess she had made the last time.

So, here she was, sitting on her bed, no chocolate to give to anyone, and no way to get any before tomorrow. What was she gonna say tomorrow, when every girl in the school shows up with a freshly made batch of chocolate to give to all the guys? How the hell was she supposed to get any before tomorrow?

Unless... no that's a horrible idea. Theres no way, asking her for help would help her situation. But it's her only option and at least having some chocolate was better than none. Yes, she'll go and ask her for help, the only person that's available right now...Orihime.

**AT ORIHIME'S** **HOUSE**

***Knock Knock***

"Hello," shouted Rukia "Orihime, are you home?"

***Bang***

***Smash***

***Ahhhh***

"Orihime, are you alright!?" Shouted Rukia from outside

***Bang***

"Oh, don't worry, I'm alright" Said the cheery voice of her friend.

"Alright," said Rukia "Can I come in?"

"Oh, yeah sure, just wait a second okay." Said Orihime

***Smash***

***Crack***

"Oh, hey Rukia! What brings you here today?" Asked Orihime as she opened the door

"Ummm, what happened to you?!" Asked Rukia, staring at the girl before her, who was covered from head to toe in flour.

"Oh, this, it's nothing! I was just a little clumsy." Said Orihime as she tried to get all the flour off of her with her hands.

"Ok... Well I came here to ask you if you could help me make some chocolate for tomorrow." Asked Rukia nervously

"Oooo chocolates, of course I can help you! I was just about to start making my own chocolates" Replied Orihime happily, as she invited Rukia in and lead her to the kitchen.

"So..What do I do first?" Asked Rukia nervously

"Well, first we need all the ingredients, so you can wait here while I go and get everything we need." Said Orihime cheerfully

"Ummm, okay then." Said Rukia nervously

As she waited for her friend to get all the stuff ready, she looked around the kitchen at all the little cartoon character stickers, stuck up on the walls of the kitchen." Well, they were cute and all, but they weren't nearly as cute as Chappy!

She suddenly noticed a small notepad that was lying open on the kitchen countertop. She walked towards it, curious to find out what it was. As she got closer to it, she realized that it was a recipe book. And the page it was opened on was the recipe on how to make chocolate.

"Hmmm, maybe if I just take a quick look at it, she wouldn't mind." Said Rukia aloud

She began reading through the recipe, being careful not to miss any important steps.

_How Make Chocolate_

_Ingredients_

_5 cups of melted chocolate _

_7 slices of butter _

_3 cups of icing sugar_

_3 jars of red bean paste_

_1 cup of flour_

_4 onions_

_2 limes_

_1 tuna_

_Steps_

_1. Put melted chocolate and bean paste in a bowl_

_2. mix the two ingredients together._

_3. add 3 cups of icing sugar and 6 slices of butter to the bowl_

_ mix_

_5. fill the bowl up with water and add the tuna and blend it_

_6. Add the flour and onions then mix. Once you've mixed it put it in the fridge to freeze_

_7. wait 30 minutes for the chocolate to freeze_

_8. once it's frozen, take chocolate out of the fridge and squeeze the two limes over it for a nice topping._

_9. Then you eat it_

She felt sick after reading that recipe, hopefully that wasn't the type of chocolate that they were making today. But the recipe was written in Orihime's handwriting, so there is a chance that they could be making something like that.

"I'm back," Orihime's cheery voice suddenly snapped her out of her thoughts

"Well, I've got all the ingredients ready, so we can start mocking now!" announced Orihime excitedly.

" Umm okay, so what do I do first?" Asked Rukia

"Well according to the recipe, first you have get put the chocolate and the bean paste in a bowl." Said Orihime

oh crap, they were making that kind of chocolate. Maybe coming here was a mistake after all, cause maybe no chocolate is better than poisoned chocolate. Wait who was she kidding, of course having no chocolate was better than having chocolate that coud end up killing her beloved Renji.

But, since she was already here, she couldn't just leave, not after she made Orihime get all the ingredients out. And plus like Byakuya always said backing out of something because ones afraid of the consequences is for the weak. she no matter how bad it looks and sounds, she's gust gonna have to go through with it.

**HALF AN HOUR LATER**

"Okay Rukia you keep watch on the chocolates and make sure that they don't freeze, while I go and clean up all the mess." Said Orihime as she got out all the cleaning equipment and began cleaning the massive mess in the kitchen.

She stood there awkwardly as she watched Orihime start to clean. She was so glad that she wasn't doing the cleaning, just looking at the mess made her feel nauseas, there were splodges of chocolate everywhere; on the walls, the floors, covering the countertops, and the even on the roof. But she kinda felt guilty for making Orihime do all the cleaning, but if she started helping she would probably just make the mess even she just continued watching her friend clean, and every once in a while she would go and check the fridge to see if the chocolate was ready.

**A FEW MINUTES LATER**

"Hey Rukia, are those chocolates ready yet?" Asked Orihime eagerly

"Umm, I'm not sure." Replied Rukia as she examined the chocolate in her hand.

It didn't even look like chocolate to her. It was brownish reddish and it had frozen beans sticking out from one of the sides. It also hand a few cut up onions sticking out from the top. And it smelt like rotten fish because of the tuna that they blended in . It didn't look editable at all. But when she gave it to Orihime, she swallowed it up in one go and said that it was delicious.

She offered one to Rukia, but she wasn't quiet sure she wanted to taste it, so they just got all the chocolate they made and began to wrap them up for all the guys. Forgetting about the massive mess that still hadn't been cleaned up.

**THE NEXT DAY**

As Rukia made her way to school, she was feeling a lot more nervous than she had expected herself to be. How was she gonna give the chocolates to Renji? She thought. What if he doesn't want them?

Cause in all honesty, she wouldn't accept the chocolates she made, if the queen handed them to her. But then again, Renji had a better heart than she did and he was much more kinder, so he might accept them. Hopefully.

She planned to hand him his chocolates first, just in case she gave a chocolate to someone else and they got food poisoning. Cause if someone did get food poisoning he would never want to accept them.

She made her way to class and noticed that everyone was already exchanging chocolates. She looked over at Renji to see him with a girl that was handing him her home made chocolates that were wrapped in a purple wrapping paper That was tied together with a pink ribbon. It was wrapped much better than her one.

Her chocolate was wrapped up with Chappy wrapping paper and then covered with large amounts of sticky tape, making it almost impossible to open.

She waited for the girl to finish giving her chocolate to Renji, the girl was very pretty, she had long blue hair and dark brown eyes. When she finally finished giving her chocolates to Renji, they said there goodbyes and she went off to give the rest of her chocolates out.

Now it was her turn. And she was starting to freak out. OMG what should I do now? How should I give it to him? She thought

Okay Rukia, calm down, there just chocolates. She said to herself

"Hey Renji!" She shouted as she approached him

"Oh, hey Rukia, what's up?" He asked

"Umm..." She started to freak out "I just wanted to give you these" she said as she handed him the chocolates.

"Wow, thanks Rukia, I didn't know you could cook," he said "Oh and what's with the rabbits?"

"Idiot! They're not just rabbits! They're Chappy!" She said angrily

"Okay then" he said, confused at her sudden out burst

"Well aren't you going to taste it?" She asked eagerly.

" Umm sure, I'll taste it if you want." He replied as he tried to unwrap the chocolate from the many layers of sticky tape that Rukia had used.

A few minutes past and Renji was still trying to unwrap the chocolate.

"How the hell do you open this thing!" He said in frustration.

"Use scissors" said Rukia

"I already tried that" said Renji, pointing to the broken scissors next to him.

"Just hurry up and open it already!" Complained Rukia, who was getting more and more impatient by the second.

**WHEN RENJI FINALLY OPENS IT!**

"Hey Rukia" Asked Renji as he examined the chocolate she gave him " What's in it?"

"Well it's chocolate dummy, what else would be in it!?" She replied, clearly annoyed.

"Ok, so what do you want me to do with it?" Asked Renji as he looked at the onion sticking out.

"Well, I want you to eat it" Replied a pissed off Rukia."what else would I want you to do with it!?"

"Oh...right, sure I'll eat it." Said Renji nervously as he slowly put be of the chocolates in his mouth.

This was the moment of truth. Rukia waited in silently to see what would happen to Renji. It's seemed to take forever for his hand to reach his mouth. And slowly, he started to chew. Nothing was happning... yet. He continued to chew on the chocolate, when suddenly he started leaning to the side, slowly. He kinda looks like he's swaying from side to side. Thought Rukia.

Moments later Renji was lying unconscious on the floor, someone called the ambulance and soon after they arrived to pick him up. They said he was unconscious due to some food poisioning or something.

I wonder what he ate for breakfast? Thought Rukia

**Thanks for reading! and Happy Valentines!**


End file.
